"Really, kid," Revel told him, "you've got to chill out a bit. You're an agent now. You'll have everything you ever wanted soon enough. The least you can do is enjoy it."
Nabuu sighed. "I know, I know. It's like Ralphie always says. You only live once."
"That's good advice, kid. Ralphie's one smart troll."
Nabuu didn't like being called a kid. Especially by some computer in a clown suit. But so far, he couldn't convince Revel that he was anything other than a little kid. He was seven years old, for Frockeneller's sake! But what could he do to show he was grown up, besides what he was already doing - liberating his people and bringing about an age of enlightenment, as Ralphie put it?
"Do you really think his plan's going to work?" Nabuu asked his friend again, in case things had changed in the past half hour. "Are the other Codellas helping us yet?"
"They will soon enough, alright? This stuff takes time to work. Look, kid, There's a celebration going on. Get out there and enjoy it already."
"I don't like celebrations," Nabuu said. "They make me nervous."
"And you wonder why I call you kid!"
Stupid psychic computers...
"I heard that too," said Revel. "Now get out of the aqueduct and go have some fun."
"But-"
"Kayla's out there. You don't want her to think you're a chicken, would you?"
Chicken? Not him! "I'll show her!" he shouted, waving his little fist.
Ralphie watched as his priceless little pawn climbed out of the aqueduct and joined the party. Three months ago, when he talked about trolls standing up for themselves, he was considered an extremist. Now he was a hero, and all because of that stupid little kid.
It was almost too much. They had a Codella, Ralphie's genius, and the element of surprise on their side. They'd get their equal rights - that was a sure thing. But why stop there? When you reach one long-range life goal, set another. That was always his guiding light in his quest for personal self-realization. So once he'd realized his dreams of equality for all trollkind, what could be more natural than his utter and complete world domination? Talk about ensuring your future.
Even now the other Codellas were falling into his beastly green hands. When his little software drug ran its course, every computer in the world would be under his control. Any day now, the ships would arrive with his special cargo, and then...
But why torture himself with anticipation? This was a celebration! Even shy little Nabuu was taking a positive social risk and building upon his relationship with that adorable little creature Kayla. She had all six of her arms around him as they danced to the sounds of the Rockin' Trolls, the first garage band ever in Little Keltarr.
Yes, the night was young. Perhaps he'd find company with a pretty young troll himself. If only that delightful Goopa were here instead of on that airship...
But there was the boar! The party was about to really begin, and it was time to act. "My people!" Ralphie shouted. The band stopped, and the trolls grew as quiet as they ever were in Little Keltarr. "Here is the boar, life of our victory feast! In a few moments we will bring back the glory of our ancestors as we celebrate for the first time in a hundred years!"
A great cheer rose from the crowd.
"Zoonky!" he called to the lead singer of the band. "Let's have something festive for the race."
They let out a few bars of cheerful fanfare and began playing the century-old troll anthem, Death of a Screaming Crowd in G Minor.
"Ladies and gentlemen, can I get a round of applause for the Rockin' Trolls?"
They shouted mindlessly, as most people did when popular singers played.
"Then let's begin. Release the boar!"
Nearly everyone in Little Keltarr was there, ten thousand trolls, and everyone had been waiting for this moment. The eight hundred pound boar was starved and angry, and it burst like lightening from its cage when the latch was released. It bolted towards the crowd, snorting madly, aiming it's tusks at the waiting trolls.
As one, they cheered. Even Ralphie leapt into the teeming crowd, his tongue hanging out as he waited for his first chance to partake of this ancient ritual. As people kicked and shoved and screamed at him, he heard screams of pain. It was pleasantly fulfilling, but he knew it was only a fellow troll. He still had a chance at the boar.
He shoved his way closer to the screaming, but was too late. As he watched, a huge troll ripped the equally huge boar's two hundred pound head off and hurled it into the air. Everyone cheered.
"Roast it!" Ralphie commanded. "And as for the rest of you, don't worry! We've got two more where that came from! Release the next one!"
It was going to be quite a festival.
Things had settled down a bit, once the boars were roasted and everyone had a chance to eat. Nabuu found that this party stuff wasn't so bad. His friend Kayla had even kissed him. He'd always considered that stuff icky, but.. He was seven years old - almost a third of his life had passed, and he was soon to be a man. So maybe kissing was all a part of being an adult. Besides, it really wasn't so bad...
The hard part had been the dancing. Kayla had six arms and six legs, and it was awfully hard not to step on her toes. Thankfully a quick dip in the aqueduct and Revel was there to psychically program his brain for dancing. Agency had its perks.
Nabuu took another bite of boar brain. They'd never eaten like this in Little Keltarr before! But someday soon, trolls would be able to buy their food in human supermarkets, and they'd be able to eat nutritious and tasteful TV dinners as they watched Embers of a Burning Heart. That was Kayla's favorite show, of course.
"Want to dance again?" she asked, when the music started up again. She was twelve and had three very pretty violet eyes.
"Sure," said Nabuu.
He took one of her many hands and lead her to the dance floor the older trolls had created by leveling half the town.
He gazed into two of her eyes, and they gazed back. Yes, it was quite a festival.
Zoonky played his guitar like a man possessed. He'd learned the guitar in a matter of days. It was his one great skill. Well, that and growing purple hair at alarming rates from every square inch of his body. He'd always been a tailor before Ralphie came, using his strong hair as thread. Now that same hair was strung across his guitar as he entertained the masses.
He was loving every minute of it. The crowd, the music, the women that kept throwing themselves at him. He gotten pretty excited about it earlier, and had actually smashed his guitar to bits over the drummer's thick head. It had been an act of purest joy. Luckily, though, he had a spare.
He wondered if maybe someday he'd be able to smash things and play his songs in front of the whole world. Humans, Trolls, Salami, even those awful Dregs would come to see and hear him. Him! Zoonky! And all because of Ralphie and his ideas about Equal Rights!
Zoonky! Live! In front of the entire world! Even on TV!
Wouldn't that be something?